The nurse while doing her rounds on the patient who had been admitted so that he could detox from his alcohol binges. His mouth appeared full.
“What are you chewing on?”
“Nothing” said the patient, his voice slightly muffled from the wad of gum in his mouth.
“There’s something in your mouth, what is it?”
Then the nurse went to give the patient some medication into his IV line and noted that there weren’t any alcohol packets in the drawer. She walked out of the room to get some more and saw that the garbage can in the room was full of alcohol packet wrappers.
“Let’s see that ‘gum.'”
The patient tried to spit the gum into his hand, but pieces of it flopped onto the bed. Kind of whitish in color, a cloth consistency, bunch of neat little square pieces.
Just what we need – Smirnoff-flavored “gum.”
Only problem is that they make vodka out of ethanol, not rubbing alcohol.
Guess that would explain the nausea and headaches.