Comments on: Dilemma

By: Mottsapplesauce

Mottsapplesauce — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 00:21:48 +0000

I think it’s because there are no Good Samaritan Laws that apply to this situation. We are so afraid to do the right thing because we can’t guess what’s in people’s hearts (other than our own). BTW, I’d point it out to management & let them handle it from there.

By: Brenda

Brenda — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 19:42:09 +0000

When my daughter was about 4 she found a $20 bill on the ground at Six Flags. Just the bill, no identifying marks. We took it to the lost and found but they told us they couldn’t id the owner and it would just go into their funds. We let her choose what to do and she donated the money to a charity.
That said I would prefer to let the management deal with a purse or wallet.

By: brighid

brighid — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 19:31:36 +0000

One night some years ago I was driving home through an elegant neighborhood when I saw a really big cat lying on its tummy at the end of a driveway, just in the street. I expected the cat to run back into the driveway when I drove by it (making sure I went wide around it), but it didn’t. That bothered me, so I stopped just down the street, parked and walked back to the cat. It still didn’t move. You know, of course, the kitty was dead.

All I could think about was some little kid coming out to catch the bus the next day and finding his or her kitty lying dead in the street. I went to the house that belonged to the driveway; the kitty wasn’t theirs, but they knew it belonged to their next door neighbors. They called the neighbors, who came out to look. Some other neighbors saw people gathering at the end of the driveway (at 9:00 at night or so) and came to see what was going on. Pretty soon there was a little crowd.

And I suddenly realized that NO ONE believed my story that I was just driving through the neighborhood and found the cat. All of them believed that I had been the one who hit it.

They were incredibly nice about it (a lot nicer than I would probably be to someone I believed had just killed one of my pets). They did at least believe I was concerned about the children in the family; it turned out the family had several small children and the parents were indeed glad that they could bury the cat and deliver the news to the kids in a less traumatic way. Nonetheless, by the time I got back in my car and drove on, my cheeks were burning and I felt guilty even though I had done nothing but the right thing. I cried all the way home, partly for the kitty and the family who would miss it and partly for having assumed the identity of the culprit in the eyes of that neighborhood.

I think you’re right. Sometimes when you do the right thing you get rewards; sometimes you get blame. You shouldn’t base your decision to do the right thing on what you expect other people’s reactions to be.

By: SeaSpray

SeaSpray — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 17:37:59 +0000

Nurse K – you said,”Besides, chicks don’t like doods digging in their purses under regular circumstances.”

That’s hilarious … but true.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 13:09:20 +0000

It’s unfortunate that you can’t even really touch the purse nowadays without having to go through a dilemma like this; so I agree with most of the other people and just give it to the manager.

By: Nurse K

Nurse K — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 08:12:35 +0000

You get accused of theft, have to defend it in court, your job puts you on administrative leave, you get convicted, you have to report it to the medical board, and you have to disclose “theft” on all your future job applications until you die…How is risking any of this the “right” thing to do? Besides, chicks don’t like doods digging in their purses under regular circumstances.

Anyone would be appreciative of someone who just pointed it out to a manager and made it so the purse wasn’t easily accessible to anyone who walked by.

By: SeaSpray

SeaSpray — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 04:55:11 +0000

“What is wrong with us when stop doing the right thing because we are too afraid of the bad things that could happen to us … for doing the right thing? ”

For too long we’ve been holding back from doing what we know is right when we see how others are wrongfully accused and the negative consequences.

People that know better stay silent.

Fear is contagious.

If more people stand up and do what’s right ..then I believe more people will do so.

Something else is different though. people also look away, are apathetic and don’t care.

Values are different.

It’s sad.

What’s wrong with people that can *watch* a 15 yr old girl get gang raped/brutalized without intervening or calling for help. SICK!

I’m sorry for digressing into something so serious… but it ties into to your “what’s wrong with people”.

People have to take a stand for what’s right, speak up, help and be outraged when appropriate.

The good people have to be heard and outnumber the bad ones.

It must’ve felt good to turn it in.. doing the right thing.

Once I walked back into the store to pay for a light bulb that I missed in the shopping cart and the girl at check out didn’t catch either. The woman at the desk seemed surprised that I walked back in to pay for it… and that caused me to feel good and hoped it was a good example.

By: SeaSpray

SeaSpray — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 03:17:21 +0000

I would’ve brought it back to management.

But I can appreciate what Nonny said and perhaps would be better to call them right then and there.

I also like what griffin is saying about just call and don’t worry what people think.

Then again.. it never hurts to be protective these days ..which is too bad.

One Friday night, a week before Thanksgiving ..I had to park way out from the store. The second i got out of my car when I got home..I realized I left my purse in the shopping cart. My wallet, checkbook and savings information were all in my purse.

I couldn’t get back to the store fast enough… went up to the front desk to see if they had it. They handed my purse back to me. The person who found it could have easily stolen it.

I was so grateful and wished I could’ve thanked them personally!

By: the psycho therapist

the psycho therapist — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 03:08:26 +0000

In my Tao, lost items found in a public place are turned over–without tampering–to the public place’s management for safe return. (I basically trust humans.) In the absence of a “hierarchy”, I assume responsibility.

My choices of action are not based on fear.

By: WhiteCoat

WhiteCoat — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 03:06:39 +0000

Griffin has my exact sentiments.
I wanted to open up the purse and try to call the family before they got too far away. Mrs. WhiteCoat was adamant that we just give the purse to the waitress. So that’s what we did.
I also used to open someone’s car door and turn off their headlights if they were left on. Now I wonder what people will think of me if they see me opening up a car door, reaching inside, then leaving.
The whole purse thing bothered me the rest of the ride home.
What is wrong with us when stop doing the right thing because we are too afraid of the bad things that could happen to us … for doing the right thing?